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Jokes – for Feb. 15, 2010

PASTOR’S ASS

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again. The headline in the local paper read: PASTOR’S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR’S ASS.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent. The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10. The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

The bishop was buried the next day.

SASKATOON WHAT?

A Saskatchewan farm couple, on their way back home in January, are at the airport in New York awaiting their flight. They are dressed in heavy boots, parka, scarf and mittens. An elderly couple standing nearby is intrigued by their manner of dress. “Look at that couple. I wonder where they’re from,” the elderly wife says to her husband. “Why don’t you go and ask them,” he says. So she shuffles over to the oddly dressed couple and says, “Excuse me. Looking at your outfits, I wondered where you’re from.”

The farmer replies: “Saskatoon, Saskatchewan.”

The woman returns to her husband who asks: “So, where are they from?” She replies: “I don’t know. They don’t speak English.

From Naden Hewko of Macklin, Sask.

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